How to Follow a Group You Were Not Invited To

Somebody announces to the whole room that the group is heading to dinner after this, not to you specifically, and that’s still an invitation if you read it right. Larry Chiang’s whole model runs on plugging into things that already exist, and a moving group headed to a real dinner is exactly that. The move isn’t to ask if you can come, it’s to fall in step with the group and add value to the walk over first.

PQRST helps you know if the group is even worth following, so preview who’s in it and question where it’s actually headed. SuperModel presence carries you here, since looking like you belong, dressed right and calm, keeps most people from ever checking the guest list. Once you’re at the table, the External API move works twice, since you borrowed the group’s momentum to get there and now borrow the dinner to have the real conversation.

Say something useful early, a good question or a fact nobody else had, anything that makes the person next to you glad you ended up there. If someone does ask who you’re with, an honest answer works better than a dodge.

Karma pays this back fast, so thank whoever let you tag along, and next time you’re the one inviting somebody new. House money means you can walk away clean if it’s clearly a closed group, since there’s usually another group headed somewhere else the same night.

This isn’t about crashing anything, it’s about noticing that most groups are more open than they look. Larry teaches this as one of the lower-risk, higher-payoff moves in his Web12 playbook, since the downside is just an awkward five seconds.